Dear Dr. June,
Father’s Day recently passed and my family was nice to me as always. The gifts are the same nice ones too like every year. I appreciate and love them. I thought about talking to my wife about doing something different and getting something different but didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. My birthday is coming soon and I want to do something different because I know it’s going to be their normal dinner. The traditional dinner is good but I would also like to do something special with my wife. How do I tell them or should I even say anything?
Signed, Nontraditional Dad
Dear Nontraditional Dad,
I really understand where you’re coming from with this one. I am a person who loves her birthday and enjoys doing different things every year. Yes, I like the traditional cake and ice cream and family dinner, etc. But there’s something about shaking things up a little and trying something new. I’m surprised this has not come up in conversation. Perhaps that’s a good way to start. During dinner, maybe start with I love that you have dinner or whatever it is they do. You are great. Then share something you saw that was different and mention that you thought it was interesting. You can ask your wife what she thinks about the two of you doing something. It can all be casual and you can gauge their reactions. So my answer is yes. You should definitely mention it. Although I stated doing so casually, you should know your family well enough to determine if you can just be more direct. Either way, give it a shot. You may be pleasantly surprised.
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